Challenge 137: Thank you for playing along

May 27, 2010

Man. I love being a coach. What greater a thing than to be able to be next to someone as they get to live their dreams? What greater thing than to be able to give someone a big push toward the thing they've always been wanting?

I've always wanted my clients to have what they want. But before, I don't think I really knew what that meant, not deep into my bones like I do now. I'm not sure I actually really believed. And the more I'm looking inward, the more I have a knowingness that I want the world for my clients. I want them to have it all. The things they've always wanted. The things they never knew they could have. The things they've struggled with their whole lives. I'm sensitive to them. I'm sensitive with them. I'm becoming more vulnerable and it's making me a better coach.

I woke up this morning in a panic from writing my blog yesterday. Was it weird? Did I say too much? Are people going to be confused? Was it good enough writing? Are people going to ask me about it...god...I hope not. I even thought of taking it down. Or writing about how I wanted to take it down. And as the minutes ticked on, it became less of a big deal. Oh well. What if they do think it's weird? So what? What if I did reveal too much. So what?

So what is the question. And I don't know the answer. What am I so afraid of? I sobbed to a coach about it yesterday, completely unexpectedly. I couldn't even look at him after. I couldn't have him SEE me. And I knew he did. He just looked RIGHT AT ME, into my eyes and into my being. Like he was reading my mind. And I was so uncomfortable I couldn't handle it and broke down. I usually do whatever it takes to avoid that feeling, but he wouldn't let me. And so I let it go.

And now I'm sitting here, at the end of my coaching day, drinking wine, feeling so lucky I get to be there with my clients. SO LUCKY someone's day is changed because of talking with me. So lucky to be doing this. What a gift. My clients are amazing and I just can't wait to see how their lives unfold. How cool is that that this is my job? I want this forever.

I am so grateful to all the steps that have led me here. Every single one. Every single person I meet and every seemingly trivial thing is all a collection of steps that have got me here. You guys are part of my journey, and if you're reading, it probably means that you have been key in my journey in one way or another. And that you're here with me now, as I go through this. Even though I have no idea who you are, I feel like we're in this together. My collective "coaches".

So thank you for playing along. Say hi every now and again.