Challenge 253: Letters after my name

Well...24 hours later and I finished my coaching oral exam. I didn't get nervous until the very moments before my first coaching session (there were two total).

On the first call, I felt I did OK. The topic wasn't very clear and I kept getting lost in the client's story. All I could do was tell her that, and ask her if she was feeling lost too. I didn't think I failed miserably, but it wasn't my most shining hour. With the second client, I felt much more connected, like I could literally FEEL her and jump into her body of emotions. This is the coolest thing when it happens. And it doesn't always happen. I think it's maybe when a client is really open or the coach is really focusing on being "over there" with the client. I don't really know why it happens that way with some clients and not with others.

So I got off the call thinking I did a pretty good job. I haven't celebrated yet. Perhaps that will come when I get my official letter.

Today is the last day of September which means birthday month is right around the corner and I don't know how I feel about it. I suppose I should celebrate but I'm not sure what I'd want to do.

I'm back where I've been the last couple years, searching MA and PhD programs online. Sometimes I feel that I am just utterly insatiable! Always wanting more or something else. But when I look back throughout the years, I've always wanted a higher degree. I just need to be able to justify spending the money and there are so many things I'm interested in...sorta. It's weird. Sometimes it feels like I want a degree just to have one, and that somehow it all fits into the bigger picture, and not like "I want to be a teacher so I need to get a degree for that." Because the end result is kind of nebulous, I go back and forth on what kind of thing to look for. I think the bottom line for me is that I'm just wildly curious and I just love learning more about the things I love. So here I am, back at square one. Absolutely ADORING coaching, but wondering if I still should shoot for more letters after my name.

Challenge 252: CPCC

I'm getting ready to take my exam. It starts in 40 minutes and I'm excited! It's the last piece of the certification pie. When I pass, I'll then be Sally Hope, CPCC, the Coachess with the Mostest.

I was going over some of my notes last night and remembering how far I've come. And not just with my skills, but as a person. It was only a year ago that I began, but it might as well be 20. Everything is different.

Today is a full day. Exam for two hours, then new client, then marketing class, then more clients. Right now I'm enjoying the quiet of the morning, drinking some tea, not yet feeling the heat of the day.

Signing off forever as just plain old Sally Hope.

Challenge 251: Leaping

I'm sitting here listening to a prep call for my coaching certification exam, going over all of the skills we'll need to use while coaching the examiners.

I'm realizing I need to go bigger. With everything. With my own life, with my coaching with my clients. Everything. I've been taking baby steps and I think I just need to leap. Even saying the words sends a wave of energy through my body. Excitement. Then possibilities.

Challenge 250: Birthday wishes

This post is dedicated to Vaughn's mom...Dorothy. It's her birthday today and she deserves the whole dang post, just for her.

So if you're reading. HAPPY BIRTHDAY MISS DOROTHY!!!!!!!!

Challenge 249: Here I go

I know I know.

It's hot here. Already in the mid seventies and it hasn't even broke 10am. It's gonna be a warm one, which is fine since me and Lily are going swimming (weeeeeee).

Today was my day to relax and sleep in, but still, I got up before 8:30. That's when my body wanted to be up, and that feels great. I've already had tea in the backyard, hung with the pup, and done some business. Next up, a hike.

Update on my boss...I am now ONLY doing what I want to be doing, and there has been a shift in our relationship as well (me standing firm in my wants and all). :-)
Two more months and then we'll see.

Today is all about work. The creative part. I want to catch up on my marketing class stuff and work on my website. My goal is to have something up that I like by Monday. Here I go.

Challenge 248: BUSY BEE

Well...things are plugging along here at the house. My day was completely booked start to finish, all with amazing things. My wonderful clients, exercise, my own coach, working on my new wordpress website (SO much to learn!!), donated some guitars through this awesome charity called Rock Start to this other awesome organization, Girls Rock Camp, had an amazing business meeting with my girl that I'm putting on a workshop with, more clients, sushi dinner, more wordpress. Now I'm here.

Whew. That's a lot. It all feels really good.

I have my coaching oral exam next week which is very exciting. Once I pass, I'll be a certified Coach! WOOO HOOOOOO.

I heard from my boss today. He agreed with EVERYTHING I said to him and damn...that felt really good. So glad I stood up for myself!

ANyway, off to bed now. Finally. Another long day tomorrow.

Challenge 247: THAT girl, ALL the time

Well...today has been incredibly busy again and also really great. I feel I'm starting to get my juju back and grew a pair today.

I talked to my boss. I thought about all the things I really like about the job and all the things I hate. And I told him everything. Everything about how he's stretched the boundaries of my job responsibilities to the point that I'm uncomfortable and unhappy and no longer willing to do it, how I feel that what he expects out of me is worth MUCH more than what he pays me, and that I'm stretched thin and done doing the shit I hate (exact words). And I told him what I would still be willing to do. And I'm not going to budge. I also wrote him out an email listing out everything I do for him. Seeing it listed like that...it's CRAZY how much crap I've allowed. No more. Uh uh. That's it.

The conversation went much better than I thought. I thought he'd get defensive or try to argue, but my case is so strong that there was nowhere for him to go besides agreeing with me. And he did. And I feel a million times better. Not just for the change in the situation, but for sticking up for myself in such a firm way. In a "not taking your SHIT anymore" way, with not trying to sugar coat or worry about my words. I wasn't wimpy. And that's what I want to take away from this. That I need to be THAT girl, ALL the time. I'm done with wimpy.

I have two more months with the family to fulfill my original contract and obligation to them (which I value in honoring). And now, those two months will be filled doing things I like. Next up...total freedom!

Challenge 246: What will it be?

UGH! Today has just been one of those days where I felt on the verge of tears the whole time. It started off with breakfast in bed (which was AMAZING) and then seemed to go downhill from there. Fast.

I FINALLY made an appointment with a local hair stylist since I can't keep traveling to Santa Barbara. I procrastinated over a year because I was afraid to let anyone but Ann touch my hair. Well...I had to do something so I went to this girl, and I HATE my haircut that I paid too much for. UGH! So annnnnnoying! It looks worse than when I went in there. And my boss has crossed the line today. I'm so tired off it all. He expects so damn much from me, and for what I do, I should be getting paid three times what I make. I'm so frustrated with myself for still being in a situation I hate. Where are my balls? Where did that girl go that never did anything she didn't like, and made it all work? She's gotta be in there somewhere. I just want to say FUCK IT! I'll figure it out.

I read this amazing article (http://binduwiles.com/buddhism/the-law-of-the-ugly-chair-guest-post-by-danielle-laporte/)about getting rid of the things in life that you don't like or aren't serving you. And how the universe always provides the right thing once you do the clearing. She calls it the law of the "ugly chair." Well my ugly chair is this job. And I keep going back saying, "well, it's not THAT bad, or THAT hard and I still need the money" but I fear that it's that attitude that is preventing me from finding the ways to fill in that money doing things I love or matter to me. I'm just waiting around for a new chair to appear before I get rid of that ugly ass eyesore in the corner. According to the theory, the getting-rid-of has to happen first. Not the other way around. I've set up a meeting with my boss for this week. What will it be?

Challenge 245: Bump on a Log

There's a sleeping boy in the house. Like a bump on a log, sprawled out, out cold. Vaughn got back today and he warned that he'd be a tired mess of a person when he got back. "It's cool," I said, "I planned on that." So all is quiet on the homefront. Fridge is stocked awaiting the wake-up. The puppy is excited, pacing back and forth trying to get the bump on the log's attention, and Bucket finally returned home after a couple days out. Everyone's happy that dad is home.

Today was another busy day, with plans from my boss changing last minute, of course. I'm so so much feeling like I don't belong there anymore, perhaps never did. I feel small there, doing shit I never like doing at my own house, not getting the credit I deserve. I was thinking about it today...if I ever have a nanny, I want to make sure he/she knows how appreciated they are. I want to buy her flowers every once in awhile, or give her an extra bonus, or give her a card. This work is hard work, and pretty thankless. Always getting stretched to the max, limits pushed further and further. If I ever have a nanny, please remind me of this.

I was also thinking of teachers today. How, unbelievably incredible and selfless that job is. To be responsible for the learning and growth of tons of students is so admirable. I helped Miles with his homework today and had no clue how to help him learn the instructions. Teachers are amazing.

I have a couple things brewing under the surface. Exciting projects that I'm working on. Hopefully the movement of them will allow the end of the nannying. Forever.

Challenge 244: Must Get Rest

Well the week and weekend has finally caught up to me. It was go go go, and now I'm crashing. It's only 8:30 pm and I feel like I could fall asleep. Yesterday and today were both really long days. Yesterday was the wedding. An absolutely gorgeous beach wedding. The weather was perfect, all my friends were there, and the bride and groom are just so happy and passionately in love. It was truly heart warming.

I didn't sleep well, sharing a hotel room with all the homies. We got up this morning, fiddled around for a bit, then drove home. I drove both there and back and I'm just wiped.

I have another crazy busy week coming up. I'm trying to brace myself for it. Good night friends. I must get rest.

Update...well, apparently I'm experiencing the curse of the overtired girl who can't sleep. UGH!!!!! Three hours later, a magazine read, a blanket chance and a room change, and I STILL can't sleep.

Challenge 243: Onward to Wedding

Well...it appears that "X" was important after all. He took the bait and we're switching a late Tuesday for an early Friday. But I realized that after I made the deal, I was still annoyed. I should have just said a hard "no." I'm still learning with him. Learning how not to keep stretching further and further to his needs, and farther and farther from my own.

I'm on a mini vacation this weekend. A college buddy of mine is getting married and a bunch of our friends are gathered to celebrate. Last night was really fun. We hung out at our friend's house (who just recently also got married) and had bad movie night. One of my most favorite things.

I'm tired this morning, but I think it's because I forgot to pack my super duper favorite morning tea. Onward to wedding.

Challenge 241: How important "X" is

My girl Sara informed me that my posts have been kind of boring lately. I think "lackluster" was the actual word she used. And I have to say...I TOTALLY agree with her. They are.

To be honest, I'm just sort of bored of writing them right now. I'm a little bit back to feeling like I can't be completely honest here, but I want to keep up my agreement to continue to write.

She was saying that she really enjoys my posts about my boss, because she can relate. So, speaking of that...I got this text from him earlier.

"Hi...On Tuesday I need you to stay until 8:30 so I can attend (my kid's) parent teacher night. Can you do that please?"

Ok...so this might not sound like a big deal to you. And maybe it isn't.
But what kind of question is that??!?!?!

It's like, "I NEED x. Like, it HAS to happen. So...you'll do it, ok?"

But he phrases it as though he's actually asking me, and as though I have a choice, which I obviously don't.

UGH!!!!!!! AND, this is after I ALREADY told him that on Tuesday nights I have a recurring client at 6:45, so I need to make sure that I'll always be leaving the house on time (6:30) those nights.

It's just a long string of this type of stuff. Of feeling kind of manipulated in the communication.

So I struck a deal. I'd do Tuesday if I could get off early on Friday.
We'll see how important X is after all.

Challenge 241: Here we go again

Gosh. Another darn full day. In fact, I have completely full days booked out until the end of next week. It feels good. The energy is buzzy. I have clients and classes and workshops and friends and activities and appointments. All great stuff. I actually had to schedule in laundry today on my calendar!!!

Another great thing of today was my girlfriend date with Lily. No kids. No boyfriends. Just us girls having a good time, eating some delicious food. And man was it great. Which made me think...I feel like girlfriends need date night just like couples need date night. Just carving out some special time for each other where you can really focus on one another. Twas divine.

A Skype business call and cleaning the kitchen and (said) laundry rounded out my night. I feel like ideas are flowing and I feel so lucky I have some GREAT friends to bounce ideas off of.

Tomorrow...wash, rinse, repeat. Here we go again!

Challenge 240: Tired in between

Busy. Tired. Full Day. Tired. Hungry. Tired.
But feels good to be so busy.

I'm a blob of a person right now. Must. Go. To. Bed.

Challenge 239: Sushi dinner

I can't believe we're already half way through September. Where did the summer go? Where did time go?

I'm afraid I haven't anything very interesting to say.

I had a lovely sushi dinner tonight with a great girlfriend, which reminded me that all you gotta do is tell people when you need them around and they show up. So many times I think we assume that others know what we want or need, and 100% of the time, we're wrong. People need to be told. And then that gives them the opportunity to be there. We had a great time, like we always do.

The puppy, on the other hand, is misbehaving. Yikes!

Challenge 238: Tomorrow, back to work

Today was a lazy day. It started out that way. I only had one real plan for noon time so it was a leisurely morning. Breakfast and tea in the backyard with the pup. Lily came over to help clean up from taco time the night before.

Speaking of taco time, the Rock n Roll Taco Bowls were a big hit, and we came home with some cash. SCORE!

Right now it's me and the puppy on the couch watching "Coal Miner's Daughter," gearing up for the VMAs. Tomorrow, back to work.

Challenge 237: Rock n Roll Taco Bowl

Apparently I'm slipping more and more out of my dedication to this blog. It honestly just slips my mind lately. I've been so busy, getting excited about all these things going that I just don't think to write.

Right now, it's hot here. In the 80's. As I sit in my office looking out the window at our lush backyard and the collection of cacti on the roof of the garage, I'm reminded how lucky I am to be here. To live in such a beautiful place with such great people surrounding me. The house is sleepy. Phoenix is napping in the other room and Coach is at my feet. It's quiet, besides the faint sound of cars on the freeway and an occaional Bart passing through.

Tonight me and Lily debut our "Rock n Roll Taco Bowls" at an art show. I'm excited to have a reason to get dressed up. FUN FUN FUN!

Challenge 236: Slightly Slothy

Today was full of good work. All work I love. Clients an learning how to push my business forward. However, I have spent almost all day day sitting in a chair. Feel slightly slothy.

I am SO into this marketing stuff. It's so fascinating and SUCH useful information. Not just about marketing, but about really really getting to the heart of what you're trying to do, why it matters, what makes you uniquely qualified. And of course, how you can use all that to offer products that people want to pay you for. SO interesting. And I'm so glad I took the course. I was THIS close to not doing it because of money reasons, but I knew in my gut it was the right choice. It's just money.
So here I am...happy!

And also tired. This has been a back to back full day. I'm looking forward to sleep. One puppy pee to go and I'm there.

Challenge 235: Oh sheesh

Oh sheesh. I did it again. Big time. Forgot, and then took ALL day to write this one. I've been super busy lately, but doing most things I love (mostly).

I signed up for this really awesome marketing class type thing and I'm eating it up. I love it. The delivery is perfect for me and the info, already, is worth the money I paid. Homework to do, but it's all so fun!

I'm wiped though. And unfortunately I am going to go now. Hopefully I'll have more juice tomorrow.

Challenge 234: Sweet sight to see

Well I guess I'm really slipping. Didn't write again yesterday I did remember, as I was falling asleep and I almost got up to write but figured it was already the following day. Way past midnight.

Today I did some work on a business idea I have. And I'm learning that the more I get deeper into the idea, the less I know what it actually is. It's frustrating. I have a feeling and a vision, but the actually day-to-day, nuts and bolts are still vague to me. It's silly...as a life coach I feel like I should be able to have it figured out, but I suppose I'm human too. I feel, now more than ever, I don't know what I want. The what. I know what I want to feel like. I know who I want "be" but what I'm doing, in clarity, is unclear. I've felt this way for a long time. And I'm bored of it.

I bet there is a magic wand. That one thing that's in my way, that I just can't really see right now.

On a completely different note...I saw a great couple on a tandem bike today, riding down my busy street in Oakland. I felt like it was a great metaphor for relationships. They're clearly working together. The success of the trip depends on both people equally pulling their weight and putting their effort into the ride. And they have to work together and be close. Literally, supporting each other. It's not a bike ride on separate bikes, but rather one ride, one bike, two lovers. Sweet sight to see.

Challenge 233: Girls Night

Oops! Oops!! Yesterday's post didn't happen. But it was because I was having too much fun. It was girl's night. Movie night and wine time and nail painting time.

The evening started early, around 6pm with Lily and Phoenix coming over to keep me company as I cleaned the house. Although Phoenix isn't much of a cleaner, she is an adorable backdrop and noise box, just learning how to say words. Lily and I decided that girl's night would be a perfect opportunity to try out our (soon to be famous) taco bowls on innocent bystanders. Soon, we will take these bowls out into the world, but first, get the opinions of our friends.

Erica came next with a giant overnight bag full of nail-polishes, gossip magazines, and her very own pillow and eyeshade. She also provided the wine and the spritzer. The four of us sat on the couch and caught up. Next...Honorine showed up with a GIANT bouquet of flowers, more flowers, and lots of great gossip.

We laughed, we ate jelly beans, we had taco time, we painted nails, we watched Thelma & Louise and we stayed up too late. Just like a good old fashioned slumber party, except no one called their mom crying or went home early. So far, it's been a lazy morning. Catching up on emails, getting ready to go pick up Phoenix for our playtime.

Feeling better, in general.

Challenge 232: Greetings loved ones

Hi Dewey!
Hi Mom!

Anyone else out there?
Let me know.

:-)

Challenge 231: Dear Sally

Dear Sally,

I saw you today. And I'm so afraid that you'll slip away again. Or that I won't have access to you. I wish I could share more, but I just can't right now.

My eyes are tired from the days. We'll talk soon.